How I'm Spending My Summer Vacation on Submission
I need a break.
Since April of last year, I’ve been chasing one goal: becoming a novelist. There’s a lot more to this story (that I’ll get to later) but in a nutshell, I got an idea, hammered it out in five weeks, began multiple rounds of revisions, wrote another book, started querying, got an agent, revised some more, started writing a third book, then went on sub (meaning my agent pitched my book to editors at publishing houses in hopes we’ll get a book deal). That’s a lot in a little over a year. And I’m finally ready to admit that to myself.
Don’t get me wrong. In so many ways, this journey has been amazing. Had you told me at the start of 2023 that I’d be here, with two completed novels and a literary agent, I’d swear you were talking about somebody else. I’d convinced myself years ago that I didn’t have the attention span nor dedication to write a full-length piece of fiction. I’d tried many times in the past and never made it past a hundred or so pages. This is nothing short of a miracle.
It’s just that it’s a very exhausting miracle. I’ve hustled so hard for this between writing and editing everyday to constantly sweating over my inbox. Part of it was passion. Another part is a scarcity mentality that if I don’t keep these creative wheels turning I’ll lose my momentum and slump back into a space where finishing a novel is impossible. Then there’s a third part that I somehow believe the constant grinding is proving to the imaginary publishing gods that I’m worthy of a book deal. I’m slowly coming to the realization that those last two parts are rooted in weird stuff I should probably work out in therapy, and the first part about the passion is perfectly normal in moderation. My love for writing doesn’t have to overtake my life despite what my natural inclination for intense focus may be telling me. See, my passion did her job. She helped me be wildly prolific for a time, and both she and I could use a breather.
What’s also helping me hit pause is the nature of the submission process. There’s nothing I can do to help my book sell. I did my part. The rest is out of my hands. I have to wait, and no amount of talking about it, researching other authors’ publishing journeys, or crying to my writing community will make the time pass faster.
So what do I do now?
It’s the unofficial start of summer, so now’s a good a time as any to begin a new adventure. A few ideas…
1) Start a YouTube channel. Gah, even typing it feels self-indulgent. However, if there’s one thing I’ve learned about social media, it’s that you never know what you’re good at until you do it and you’d be surprised what content will resonate with people. I’m still stunned I have such a big following on TikTok. And yes, there’s no guarantee that it’ll translate into long form video content on another platform. But I gotta see. I’ve never had a shortage of things to say. This is just another venue to say them.
2) Start blogging again. Hey, look at that, we’re already there. But seriously, I’ve neglected this space for months at a time as you can see. Blogging used to be my jam. I did it for work. My words have had such an impact that it got me kicked out of some religious social circles. Before all the social media apps, this is where I honed my voice. I need to get back to that place. Plus, I’m a reader of blogs and it’s so fun to watch a person’s journey from start to finish on their goals. I’ve spent countless hours searching for someone else’s words to help me feel less alone whether I was querying or sleeplessly managing new motherhood. It feels like giving back so perhaps someone else can find themselves here.
3) Speaking of which, help some folks. Giving up my dream to be in academia remains the hardest thing I’ve ever done. However, when I think about it, what I really want to do is help people. I want to answer their questions and give them information that will increase their knowledge. I love the idea of wisdom and that it can be shared. Perhaps someone finds their voice because I used mine. I don’t know. Still figuring this one out, but at the heart of it, I want to take my eyes off my own challenges and help someone else get through theirs.
With any luck, I won’t be on submission for this entire summer. I’m not giving up hope that this book will sell in this round with all the heavy hitters holding my manuscript at the time of this posting. However, obsessing over every email notification isn’t helping. At least with this plan, I’ve got something to do that’s constructive.
What are your plans for the summer?
~jennifer.
